The Only Way Up Is In: 3 Effective Self Care Tips to Thrive Mentally, Emotionally, and Socially
Welcome to the Missing Link Blog. A space created to provide the essentials you need to connect with God, live in purpose, and grow into your best.
It’s challenging to know what you want out of life without deeply understanding who you are. If you want to experience all the great things God has in store for you, then you must stop running from yourself, dive deep within, and discover who you truly are.
I will be the first to admit…inner work doesn’t always feel good or look good. When seeking to discover your true and authentic self, you will go through a whirlwind of positive and negative thoughts, feelings, and emotions harboring on the inside of you; stemming from the opinions of others and hurtful experiences over the course of your life to the silent whispers you speak about yourself.
Inner work can be exhausting! However, there’s nothing more draining than living a life unaware of your abilities and strengths, particularly, when you stop hiding from a process that can only heal, improve, and reveal your true identity and purpose.
It’s time to embrace the healing and transformative power that exists within.
Engage in an experience that helps you discover….You!
In this article you will learn the power of self awareness, inner work, and effective ways to explore yourself for mental, emotional, and social stability.
Don’t go through life feeling like a victim when you have the opportunity to live as a victor.
You must spend time getting to know yourself on a deep and intimate level.
Knowing your weaknesses and shortcomings allow you to make powerful and life-changing informed decisions.
Inner work is an uncomfortable yet essential process that helps you eliminate all the internal false narratives standing in your way of living your best life.
There’s really no easy way to say this…..and this can honestly be one of the main reasons you feel as though Adulting Sucks. Growing up, we are often told what to do, what to learn, and what should matter to us. As children, we need this leadership. Much of the advice and guidance we receive is helpful as we learn how to navigate in the world, but it can also create a dependency that is difficult to recognize. Although this insight helps us grow and develop, it subconsciously leads us to believe that if others can teach us how to exist in the world, then they must also know who we are, what’s our life purpose, and what we need to do to become our greatest selves.
When you seek others to help you understand yourself in this way, you have the potential to receive helpful feedback, but the truth of the matter is, you are the only one on this planet who knows who you are. In order to achieve a true understanding of what matters to you, you must spend time getting to know yourself on a deep and intimate level.
The decision to develop your self awareness often occurs after many experiences have shaped how you think, feel, and live your life. When you begin to explore your inner world, what you may discover is....you’re not living from a place of authenticity, you’re living from a space of survival, fear, and people pleasing.
🗣 “This is how I need to think to be liked by my peers”
🗣 “This is how I need to dress to be cool.”
🗣 “This is how I need to act to be loved.”
🗣 “This is the career I need to attain to be successful.”
Are those your thoughts? Do they align with who you truly are? Are they manifestations of what you believe you should become due to social conditioning?
These thoughts and questions may create the pain and fear associated with looking inward. You may begin to realize, everything you think you know and love, is something you were taught to enjoy; not what you actually feel connected to. Research shows that many young adults work hard to achieve success and are able to reach their goals; yet they arrive feeling unfulfilled, unpurposeful, and left craving the need to understand….who am I?
You must explore yourself to understand yourself.
That is why it’s SOul important to approach this level of work with care and intentionality so you may discover the answer to living a happy, purposeful, and fulfilled life.
Inner work will require you to embrace and recollect your experiences; the good, the bad, the pain, and the trauma. Doing so allows you to transform your perspective to see how each experience serves as an opportunity for you to grow and develop into your best. As mentioned before, this can be a painful process. No one wants to remember or be triggered into memories they tried so hard to forget. But if you don’t face what hurts you, you will never experience life as the healed and evolved you.
The process of decluttering your heart, mind, and actions of learned behavior takes time and should be approached with love. In many ways, you are getting to know yourself for the first time and we want to help you engage in a healthy process of exploring yourself for mental, emotional, and social stability.
Inner work is the key that unlocks your ability to know who you are with clarity, confidence, and compassion.
Here are three effective ways to perform inner work that may lead to mental, emotional, and social stability:
Identify What Matters Most: Much of the heartache and hardships experienced in adulthood stem from not knowing what matters most to you. This leads to decision making that isn’t based on what carries significance in your life yet has the power to affect your time, energy, and feelings in causes, careers, and social settings that don’t nourish your soul, feed your dreams, or encourage your growth and development. Take a few moments to reflect on what truly matters to YOU and why. During this exercise, be sure to examine if your responses are based on who you truly are or what you believe you should become. Note: Check out our Journal Prompts for Building Success. An amazing tool to get you started on this process.
Face the Pain: There’s no getting around it. If you try to ignore any pain you’ve experienced by burying it deep inside, it’ll showcase in others areas of your life; triggering you into its memory until you address it and heal. This is challenging but very rewarding work to your life and your future life experiences. Ask yourself: Why go through life feeling as a victim when I have the opportunity to live as a victor? When you face the pain, you gain control over your emotions and acquire the mental toughness to overcome feelings associated with the experience. You may never understand why certain things happened to you but you must have the strength to reflect and release. Make a choice to courageously live beyond what you experienced by morphing it into a learning opportunity. Note: Access our Journal prompts for Self Reflection to begin working through this process.
Nurture the Child Within: Your true and authentic self feels like a genie in a bottle; stored up, pent up, and waiting for a chance to be set free. As you begin to uncover who you are, what you love, and why it matters to you, you will notice an overwhelming amount of inspiration flow to and through you. This may lead you to engage in activities related to your childhood. Embrace it. Feed it. Nurture the feeling of connecting to you. This is your mind, body, and spirit's way of getting you to recall your authenticity so it may be incorporated into how you; show up in the world, connect with those around you, and express your inner gifts for purposeful living.
You must spend time getting to know yourself on a deep and intimate level if you want to live your best life from a real and authentic space.
How deep are your inner wounds? We understand how challenging it can be to live in this world. You may have experienced deep pain, heartbreak, and/or cruelty when being yourself. Bullying, cyberbullying, and ugly spirited people do exist. We apologize if they have made you feel low about yourself to the point of wanting to hurt, harm, or take your own life. If you are struggling with anxiety, depression, or suicidal thoughts, please access the YouthLine today by texting teen2teen to 839863, or by calling 1-877-968-8491
If you would like to receive support and practical guidance on how to pivot back to purpose, we would love to help you win! Click here to join the FYIG community and receive helpful ways to manage stress and develop healthy habits for adulthood.
Inner work can be exhausting….but there’s nothing more draining than living a life unaware of your abilities and strengths, particularly, when you stop hiding from the essential process that helps you heal, improve, and reveal your true identity and purpose.
The Missing Link to Your Adulting Success:
Spend intentional time getting acquainted with yourself.
If you could do anything in the world, what would you do? Who would you become?
How can you show yourself compassion for what you have gone through?
Spend time engaging in practices that encourage successful living: prayer, meditation, and/or journaling. Attempt to recall the commitment you made to yourself, before you were born.
Reflect on This:
In what ways will you intentionally work towards becoming a better you?
What would the “healed you” do?
Over the next 90 days, what inner battles will you courageously face and overcome?
You have the power to overcome, rebuild, and discover the greatness that is YOU but....Inner work is a must do.!
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What Does Inner Work Look Like was written by Dr. Amirah B. Abdullah; YouTube Commentary by Stanette D.